Beau - Herd Hand

Meet Beau, also known as “Sissy Boo-Boo,” a Red Australian Cattle Dog blessed with movie-star looks, boundless enthusiasm, and approximately three functioning brain cells that are all currently occupied chasing butterflies.

Beau is a deeply devoted companion who believes personal space is a myth. He must remain within a two-foot radius of his favorite human at all times, carefully monitoring their every movement like a furry, emotionally unstable security system. Unfortunately, this devotion comes with conditions: while he demands constant attention, admiration, and acknowledgment, actual physical touching is strongly discouraged and may be met with dramatic offense.

When separated from his people, Beau does not process his emotions in a healthy manner. Instead, he channels his disappointment into a long-running campaign against footwear. Shoes, in his opinion, are directly responsible for abandonment and must be punished accordingly.

Traveling is Beau’s greatest passion. Whether it's a cross-country road trip or a two-minute drive to the mailbox, he expects—and aggressively campaigns for—the front seat. He considers himself an expert navigator despite having absolutely no understanding of where he is going.

Life is one endless competition with his older brother, Rip. Beau is determined to be cuter, faster, higher-jumping, and more impressive in every conceivable way. Whether he is actually succeeding is beside the point. What matters is that he believes he is winning.

Across the pasture, Beau can often be spotted sprinting at full speed after butterflies, tongue dangling out of his mouth, eyes fixed on absolutely nothing, and wearing the kind of expression that suggests there is a strong breeze blowing through an otherwise empty room. He attacks every day with reckless optimism, limitless energy, and a confidence completely unsupported by evidence.

Despite being a world-class dingbat, Beau remains impossible not to love. He is loyal, entertaining, ridiculous, and living proof that intelligence is not a requirement for happiness.

Special Talents

*       Following his owner from room to room without ever actually touching them

*       Declaring war on shoes after even the shortest separation

*       Occupying the front seat before anyone else has a chance

*       Looking adorably clueless in nearly every situation

Hobbies

*       Road trips of any length

*       Competing with Rip for absolutely no reason

*       Monitoring his owner’s location 24/7

*       Making dramatic scenes out of minor inconveniences

*       Running around the pasture with the confidence of a genius and the judgment of a potato